Resentment is a sign that you've stayed too long

I used to pride myself on how long I could stay on at a job.

At how long I could stay in a relationship.

Because longevity was the metric. A marker of success that my brain had decided on.

“Alignment” was not a word I knew.

So I didn’t know that my body telling me “no” wasn’t normal. It just seemed like something I needed to tough out.

And “toughing things out” showed up as complaining, criticizing, getting frustrated, finding ways to cope with the boredom. All symptoms of a much larger problem - I knew I wasn’t doing what I was meant to do with my time.

I knew I wasn’t doing what I was meant to do with my life.

But I stayed on because leaving felt 1) scary 2) selfish 3) impossible

I’d remind myself of the things I lacked. I’d remind myself of all the things I didn’t know. I’d remind myself of all the people I’d be letting down.

So I stayed. And let the resentment grow. Because it made me sarcastic, and sharp. And somehow I convinced myself there was a strength in that. An impenetrable armour that kept me safe - from what anybody could say to me.

But mostly, from all the corrosive things I’d say to myself.

Resentment weighs heavily in the veins, like lead slowing blood flow. It slows us down, makes us powerless.

It takes so much energy to continue justifying a situation we know to be wrong.

And yet I stayed, for years longer than I felt it had stopped being right, because of all the justifications.

Just because we repeat something a thousand times doesn’t make it true.

When I finally left, whether it was the job, the relationship, the place, there was never really a grand finale.

It was actually quite anticlimactic, compared to all the drama during it.

Decisions generally are.

It’s the indecision that’s tempestuous.

It’s amazing how quickly the storms stop when we finally say, “enough.”

Where have you stayed too long?

If this landed, it might be because some part of you already knows where you’ve been staying past the point of truth. The resentment, the heaviness, the constant mental justification. My work is for people who are ready to stop forcing themselves through what no longer fits, and start making decisions from clarity instead of fear, pressure, or habit. Together, we slow things down enough for you to hear yourself again, rebuild trust with your body, and move forward in a way that feels aligned rather than exhausting. If you’re ready to explore what “enough” could actually look like in your own life, you’re welcome to book a free call and see if this work feels like a fit.