Give yourself the luxury of knowing nothing

This is for my carers, givers, helpers, fixers, and doers out there.

The ones who make it a point, who make it their job, to know everything.

To be the most prepared.

To have all the answers.

This week, give yourself this:

The luxury of knowing nothing.

Yesterday I attended my first yoga class in Mexico! It was a 90 minute Therapeutic Hatha class that was all in Spanish. I think I caught onto about 5% of the words (I know some body parts and verbs and adjectives lol).

Here’s what I noticed:

“Om” is the same all around the world.

So is the feeling of having someone be kind to you. The feeling of someone taking care of themselves in the space beside you. The feeling of synchronized movement, working towards a common goal.

The reminder that there is no separation.

I loved the feeling of being a little lost. Of being a beginner again. Getting to look around the room and at the teacher to see what we were doing next. Looking out the door into the garden of a place I’d never been before. The way the sun cast ever-so-slight shadows in the rough striations of the ceiling. The varying opacities of white on the walls. The echo of the teacher’s voice. The roll of her r’s.

Noticing how my body felt lying on a different mat, on a different floor, in a different country. How everything around us is always borrowed.

I walked out of there reminded of the very first yoga class I took in 2019. It was around this time of year as well. How much can change in six years. It doesn’t sound that long. But it feels like several lifetimes ago.

Someone said to me that they felt life passes by so quickly. I hear that often. But does it?

I think when I was on autopilot it did. But when I started questioning things, and wanting to change things, then it didn’t. Because so much can change, month to month, year to year, when we’ve decided to be intentional. 90 minutes can go by quickly if I’m looking at a screen. 90 minutes can feel like hours, or days for some, if asked to sit in noble silence, unmoving, eyes closed.

I guess more and more, I’m realizing that time, indeed, is relative. It’s not fixed. How we experience time really depends on the state of our inner world. Where we place our attention. Where we place our care. Where we place our love.

So for my carers, givers, helpers, fixers, and doers out there - please do something for yourself today. Allow yourself a place or situation where you don’t know anything. Let someone else tell you what to do next. Allow yourself the space to only focus on learning the next thing - about yourself, about the world.

And perhaps noticing that there really isn’t a difference between the two.